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[23:14] <Xavier> Ok, I'm back ... sorry about that, everything should be good now.

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[23:14] <Xavier> Thanks Anely, they are paintings inspired by participants who accessed the WebStudio and chatted online, just like you're doing right now. Thanks for joining us.

[23:15] <Xavier> Is there anything you'd like to add? Are you familiar with the process?

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[23:15] <Verdegris> hello

[23:15] <Xavier> Welcome Verdegris

[23:15] <pipi> so am i supposed to tell you what i think love is?

[23:16] <Xavier> Thanks for joining us, I was just telling pipi that this is a process inspired by participants like yourself.

[23:17] <Xavier> This particular painting attempts to capture the difficulty couples may have in communicating and in understanding one another. You can visit the logs of previous sessions to see how we got to this surreal composition.

[23:17] <Verdegris> the love in that paiinting seems kind of scary

[23:17] <pipi> i can't see the paintings anymore

[23:17] <Verdegris> what other kinds of love will u be painting about?

[23:17] <Xavier> Yes pipi, but try to put it in the context of people sharing and communicating that love and the barriers that arise therein.

[23:18] <Xavier> Try pressing the refreshing button, pipi

[23:18] <Verdegris> love is a refreshing button

[23:18] <pipi> it's o.k. i have it now

[23:19] <Xavier> In the next couple of sessions both this painting and the prior one will probably be completed based on the input I receive from these live chat sessions, the discussion forums, and the emails -- we'll develop the theme for the third painting on love based on all this.

[23:19] <Verdegris> are you almost done with this painting?

[23:19] <Xavier> (If I disappear right now, I'll be right back...)

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[23:20] <Verdegris> Hi Pipi

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[23:20] <pipi> hi there:)

[23:20] <Verdegris> isn't this weird?

[23:21] <Xavier> So far there seems to be a strong interest in memories, things people remember about relationships they may no longer be involved with (see participant's gallery). But it's up to us (you) to really drive that impulse.

[23:21] <Xavier> Isn't what weird, Verdegris?

[23:21] <Verdegris> the theme of the "first love"

[23:22] <Verdegris> teh first kiss

[23:22] <Verdegris> the first time making love

[23:22] <Verdegris> firsts

[23:22] <Verdegris> or love in the abstract

[23:22] <Xavier> the first Love Painting started 10 days ago, focused on the dying, familial, eternal love.

[23:22] <Verdegris> love of strangers

[23:23] <Verdegris> the altruistic love of mother theresa for a dying person in calcutta

[23:24] <Verdegris> is that a kind of love we can really understand?

[23:24] <Xavier> There maybe memories captured from the love discussed during the first painting and/or the one we discuss now. Indeed, being that this painting I'm working on is truly coming to a close, it may be an opportune time for us here to frame the theme and composition of our next -- the third -- painting.

[23:24] <Verdegris> kewl

[23:24] <Xavier> What do you think?

[23:24] <Xavier> (Again, if I seem to leave, I'll be right back)

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[23:25] <Verdegris> what do you think pipi

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[23:25] <Xavier> Minor technical annoyances, sorry about that.

[23:25] <Verdegris> no sweat

[23:26] <Xavier> Thanks

[23:26] <Verdegris> carnal love

[23:26] <Verdegris> or spiritual love

[23:27] <Verdegris> was Mother T. doing it out of love for her fellow human or out of fear that God would stop

[23:27] <Xavier> I wonder if love, in all of its forms, manifests itself with components traditionally reserved for specific forms ...

[23:27] <Verdegris> loving her if she didn't follow orders

[23:27] <Verdegris> huh?

[23:27] <pipi> i think love has so many different forms that it can take that it is really hard to try and describe one definition for love

[23:28] <Xavier> Good point, pipi

[23:28] <Xavier> Do we sacrifice ourselves for another out of an intense love, or as a ticket to security in our old age -- stability through the children we create.

[23:29] <Xavier> Doesn't that have applicability in every form of love we attempt to describe?

[23:29] <Xavier> In fact, does love of self supercede/precede anything else?

[23:29] <Xavier> How can you love another if you don't even love yourself?

[23:30] <Xavier> In Spanish there's a term that says, "Hablando mierda", which means talking shit...

[23:30] <Xavier> Does this conversation seem to have that flavor?

[23:31] <Xavier> In maybe so unfocused and amorphous, we speak in such generalities we maybe losing our very ability to communicate coherently.

[23:31] <Xavier> What do you think?

[23:32] <Xavier> My cohorts here at the WebStudio think I may have offended ... I disagree. Comments?

[23:33] <pipi> in almost every older relationship that i've seen the two people always seem almost miserable together but stay together out of some sense of tradition,security and basically because they feel it's to late to start over thats really sad to me

[23:35] <Xavier> pipi, do you think that's because of their inability to keep their romance alive (whatever that means sexually or otherwise)? Is it because they have lost their ability to communicate? Or is it in their love their personal and joint evolution did not occur evenly?

[23:36] <Verdegris> that's an interesting set of questions

[23:36] <Verdegris> growth rarely occurs at the same rate

[23:36] <Xavier> Do you have an interesting set of answers?

[23:36] <Verdegris> your two legs aren't even the same length!

[23:37] <Xavier> So does altruistic love (ala Mother Teresa) compensate for different rates?

[23:37] <Verdegris> i don't have answers

[23:37] <Xavier> So what is love and what is it supposed to do through time?

[23:37] <Xavier> It must adapt, mustn't it?

[23:37] <Verdegris> yes

[23:38] <Verdegris> but you say it as if it had a life and will of its own

[23:38] <Xavier> And those who share it must communicate through this adaptation process, should they not?

[23:38] <Verdegris> sometimes people on't even know what they really have and don't appreciate it

[23:39] <Xavier> Is that it? Is the "equalizer" in this growth-rate problem the couple's inability to communicate that growth differential? Those that can't communicate break up because they can't keep up with the pace of change.

[23:39] <pipi> well it's problably a little bit of all of these but mainly they grow older and grow apart but feel that this is what love was supposed to be like because maybe they just don't know any better. also maybe life and love just turned out to be a disappointment

[23:39] <Verdegris> there has to be faith, confidence, trust in the other person

[23:39] <Xavier> "It" being love?

[23:39] <Verdegris> my parents probably should have divorced for the reasons pipi says

[23:39] <Verdegris> but they stayed together

[23:40] <Xavier> Maybe that's the whole problem here ... maybe we're asking the wrong questions. Kind of like asking "What is sky?" instead of asking "What is the weather like?"

[23:40] <Xavier> You think that might be what's tripping us here?

[23:40] <Verdegris> hmm

[23:40] <pipi> mine did but after he had afairs to try and fill the void in the marriage

[23:40] <Xavier> So the affair, pipi, was an act of love?

[23:40] <Verdegris> is this about sex and what it means?

[23:41] <Verdegris> or desperation

[23:41] <Verdegris> or boredon or cowardice or convenience

[23:41] <Verdegris> love is a shared illusion

[23:41] <Verdegris> i gotta go pee

[23:41] <pipi> i think thats along with other things is what he was looking for more than anything attention i think

[23:42] <pipi> i think the purest and problably the only true love that exists is the love for your child

[23:43] <Xavier> I think that in the context in this painting about miscommunication, infidelity -- that is, being unfaithful or untrue -- might be a barrier to communication and to the love concept we've been advancing (more communication improves love).

[23:44] <Xavier> Someone else said that earlier, pipi, during the first Love painting.

[23:44] <pipi> : )

[23:44] <Xavier> Do you think that advances the first claim that love is not about altruism, but self-interest?

[23:44] <Xavier> :)

[23:45] <Xavier> Presumably, you're child will not abandon you at your death bedl; a lover may divorce you after thirty years of marriage.

[23:45] <Xavier> Or is that maternal extinct self-serving in that it's about propogating the parent's gene pool?

[23:45] <pipi> speaking of which she has been screaming in my ear the whole time so i'm not sure if anything i have been writing has made sense at all

[23:46] <Xavier> "She" being?

[23:47] <pipi> there is definatly a sense of security when you have a child. You feel like that love will never die because it just can't so in some ways it is a little selfish.

[23:47] <pipi> my daughter is who i was talking about earlier

[23:48] <Xavier> Is true love about risk?

[23:48] <pipi> i don't thnk it has to be

[23:48] <pipi> but you seem to always take a risk when you fall in love :(

[23:49] <Xavier> The picture all of us are painting here about an amorous, loving relationship between two concenting adults seems to be looking bleaker by the second. What hope do we hold out for finding soul mates, people to love selected by us and not by our birth-rite?

[23:50] <Xavier> Can we as a society be that cynical to say there's no such thing as ... love?

[23:50] <Xavier> And don't you take a risk when you stay in love, too?

[23:50] <pipi> i think we all have soul mates it's just the searching for yours thats the hard part

[23:50] <Xavier> And isn't it that thrill of risk that causes love to strengthen and grow?

[23:51] <Xavier> I mean, let's look at it another way... Those achievements that were hard to come by (riskier in attaining) are the ones we treasure.

[23:51] <Xavier> Shouldn't the love that we give ourselves to blindly and risk injury and pride be that true love that we all aspire to?

[23:52] <Xavier> The hard part = the risky part

[23:52] <Xavier> I think keeping that soul mate is the harder part.

[23:52] <pipi> but love isn't supposed to be hard to achieve

[23:53] <Xavier> You can both pretty much agree that you are made for each other at time present. it is riskier to predict that for some future point in time.

[23:53] <Xavier> Tell that to marriage counselors and divorce attorneys.

[23:54] <pipi> if you are kind ,honest and generous in your love than it isn't hard to keep the love alive

[23:55] <Xavier> Even through time, pipi? When different interests, people, and priorities come into a relationship?

[23:56] <pipi> you work through them with all you have, and communicate your changes

[23:57] <Xavier> Well wouldn't this constitute working hard to keep love alive?

[23:57] <Xavier> I guess not if it's worth fighting for.

[23:58] <Xavier> This painting I'm working on is about the difficulty in that process -- the difficulty in keeping it alive, the difficulty in keeping that flickering candle on the upper righthand corner of this painting from blowing out.

[23:58] <pipi> and i believe that a relationship can survive the tough years and if it can't then you have to accept that and find your true soul mate maybe your soul mate for your second round in life

[23:59] <Xavier> ... and the compensation and strides we have to make -- ice cream -- to keep the love alive.

[23:59] <Xavier> Is it that we have different soul mates or evolving souls?

[23:59] <pipi> hmmm

[00:00] <Xavier> Why don't you think about it and add your comments to the discussion forum, because the webstudio's about to close.

[00:00] <pipi> maybe there are different soul mates for your different stages in life

[00:00] <Xavier> We'll use the comments from the discussion forum to formulate the theme for the next painting.

[00:01] <pipi> o.k. it was nice talking to you :)

[00:01] <pipi> take care and good luck on your paintings

[00:02] <Xavier> Thank you pipi for participating in this session of the WebStudio ... we'll back next week, please check the schedule.

[00:02] <pipi> o.k.

[00:02] <Xavier> Have a good night :)

[00:02] <Xavier> And pinch your baby's cheeks for me

[00:02] <Xavier> love, X

[00:02] <pipi> good night

[00:02] <pipi> :)

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